There are two things one must keep in mind when hearing my views on nature versus nurture:

1. I have a queer older sister, two queer uncles, and I assume a handful of extended relatives are of the same persuasion.

2. I saw a lot of boobs when I was little because my dad had a lot of Internet porn. That said, my first moment of sexual arousal came at a period where I had barely started puberty, with no physical indications. It involved a fake picture of Mel Gibson reclining in a waterfall. His fake penis was very large, and I wanted very much to touch it. (Yes, this image above is the one in question! I Googled it.)

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So, nature? Nurture? I'm incredibly inclined to lean towards the former, with related aspects corresponding strongly to the latter. I mean, I don't view sexuality as cut and dry. There are a lot of aspects to my sexuality that are related to problems in my upbringing. Visual-physical disconnects (I love straight porn), fetishes, roles, drives--to me, at least, these things aren't just aspects that are determined at birth.

I absolutely believe a lot of my parental--specifically paternal--issues shaped a lot of my emotional and sexual development. There's no defining factor or moment; it's more of this amorphous blob of events that led me to where I am. Sexuality is so wrapped up in a larger emotional realm, and my emotions were shaped by a lack of a father, a mother who was always at work to compensate, an outcast status throughout school, and other things, large and small. That said, I had queer feelings before I knew I had father issues, so it's far from the end-all and be-all.

So, as Hillary might say: Diamonds, pearls, nature, nurture...Can't I have it all?

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